Speaking the Inarguable Truth

 

The most important reason for telling the truth is that it creates more vitality, creativity and choices for you.

The immediate cash value of telling the truth is that it stops arguments.

People often go through three stages in learning to speak the truth in relationships:

  1. Non Truth

  2. Half Truth

  3. The Inarguable Truth

Concealing your experience and emotions has a significant effect on you.

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Revealing your emotions and sharing about your experience also has a profound effect on you and your life.

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Learning How to Speak the Inarguable Truth

In learning to speak the inarguable truth, most of us go through a learning process. Be patient with yourself as you learn. You're likely to forget how to speak the inarguable truth. When you do forget, simply choose to step back into 100% responsibility and speak what's inarguable right then.

Here's the stages of truth:

Non Truth involves things like blame, who said what, justifying, being right, and running to the victim position.

Half Truth is when you are using vague labels for your experience ("I'm OK"), explaining or analyzing (“I’m feeling kind of o because the atmospheric pressure is low and I slept wrong on my neck.”), and using negatives (“I’m not feeling bad, I’m not feeling good, I’m not feeling much of anything.”)

The Inarguable Truth is when you are expressing:

  • Body sensations. Examples: "My neck is tight" and "My palms are sweaty and my stomach is in knots"

  • Core feelings/emotions. Examples: "I'm happy" or "I'm sad" or "I'm feeling scared")

  • Specific Thoughts/Imaginings/Interpretations. Example: “I just heard a raspy voice in my head telling me to shut up.”

  • Familiar Patterns and Experiences. Example: “This tight feeling in my belly is like how I felt at mealtimes as a kid.”

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Where Emotions are Located in Your Body

Use this graphic to support you identifying which emotions you are experiencing.

 
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